One of the highlights of Misty's time here was our trip to Paris with my little guy, Evan. I should start by saying that I am not the best trip planner, though I do spend a long time trying to plan. Misty flew from Ohio to Paris to Nuremberg, Germany on a Sunday, and on that Monday we flew from Nuremberg to Paris. Oops. I should have just met her there! I'm actually glad I didn't, though, because we had a heck of a time getting there.
I found a really good deal on flights, so we decided that would be better than making the six to seven hour drive with a four-year-old. So we had my neighbor drive us to the train station, which we took to the subway, which we took to the airport, where they put us on a bus and drove us up to our plane to France. We thought that was pretty funny. We had no idea that was only a small fraction of our public transportation adventure! When we landed in France, at Charles de Gualle airport which is HUGE, we had no idea where to go. We were told to get on a shuttle to the main terminal. Easy enough. We asked some very helpful airport employees, one of which Misty said looked like Edward Cullen, how we should best get to our hotel. They gave us a map and showed us how we should take a bus to the train and when we got off of the train we could walk less than a block to our hotel. Seems easy, right? Well, the bus was our first hiccup. We couldn't even figure out where to buy the freaking tickets for the bus because there were so many different kiosks and guess what, neither of us speak any French! We finally found the right one with some help, but were in a huge line and saying how we were definitely going to miss this bus. A British angel named Charmaine overheard us and said, "Come get in line with me! Come on, you can make this bus!" It was so nice.
About that time, a guy came running into the airport and said, "All of you getting on the bus to Montparnasse, come now. Follow me! Come! It's here, you can just pay the driver. Come, come quickly." Now, I thought this seemed fishy, but everyone else was doing it, so yeah, we did too. It wasn't fishy at all. The dude really was helping all of us, and we really could buy tickets on the bus. Good thing, because the next bus wasn't for another hour. All he wanted for his advice and carrying our bags was ten Euros. Yeah, we gave it to him.
Once on the bus, we were feeling pretty good. Like, hey, we made it to Paris, we are headed towards our hotel, and Charmaine here is giving us tons of advice. It was really nice. We knew that at our stop we just had to get on the subway and we would be there. So at our stop we got our bags, thanked Charmaine for all of her help, and headed towards the train station that was at our stop just like we were told it would be. Look at us, world travelers! No problem. We went in to the information center to ask about train tickets. The guy said he didn't speak English (we did learn to say "Parlez-vous anglais?"), but turns out he wasn't too bad. He started circling on a map where we should go. Montparnasse. This is when I got confused. "Hold on, hold on. Aren't we at Montparnasse?" I asked. "No, you're here. Gare de Lyon." Misty and I both looked at each other like, what the?! The bus didn't announce the stops and we both assumed we were at the right place. We were so annoyed when we found out we had to get back on a bus, and then on to the subway. So we trek back outside with our bags, and the now tired and hungry Evan, and try to find bus 91. We find it and get on, but the driver tells us, "No no, Montparnasse other direction," and points behind him. So, right bus number, wrong bus direction. We get off that bus and find the correct one down the street. Not too bad, but by this time we have been traveling since 9 am and it is now 4 pm. We could have driven and been to our hotel already. Not to mention I am now starving. Now, if you know me, you know I have to eat every couple of hours and if I don't I am not a pleasant person. It's like my body is going into premature starvation mode and all I can think about is food. I actually said to Misty, "I think we are in the Parisian ghetto right now, but I am so hungry I don't even care. I am about to break into some ghetto house and steal some crackers!" We started laughing and this eased our mood, while making French people on the bus stare at us.
Once off of the bus and at the subway station, we get tickets and we are feeling okay. We're almost there, right? We get to our platform and the train is there with the doors open, so I rush on. Only the doors were closing, my suitcase gets stuck in the door, and Misty and Evan are behind me, not on the train with me, still on the platform. I turn around to try and get off because this train is about to take off, but I am stuck in the doors. Immediate panic ensues! I think I am about to get separated not only from my friend, but from my child, in a city neither of us know. I start screaming, "No! NO! NO! NO! NO!" and try to push my way out. Two guys get up and pry the doors open and I kind of tumble out with my bag. Misty and I look at each other like, "Oh my God! Did that just happen?" I was still feeling panicked and she tried to calm me down. The next train came quickly and we made sure we all got on as soon as the doors opened. I was telling Misty that I was so scared thinking I was going to get separated from them and I just burst into tears. People were looking at me, but I couldn't stop. I was scared, hungry, and honestly, ready to go to our hotel and possibly never leave it. Misty was crying too and Evan was just looking at us like we were at least a little crazy. Finally, FINALLY, we got off the subway and walked up to the street. When I turned around and saw the name of our hotel, it was like a chorus of angels singing! We made it, checked in, and decided it was much too dangerous to brave the streets of Paris, so we just ordered like 127 Euros worth of room service. For you exchange-rate conscious people like me, that's about $180! What did we get for that? Oh just some chicken and salmon and fries. Yes, it was that much. No, it was not the best chicken I've ever had in my life. Yes, it was worth it after all of that crazy traveling.
After the crazy adventure that was Monday, we stayed in and went to sleep. Well, Evan and I slept. Misty seems like she can go days without sleeping. Life of a nurse! The next morning we were ready to go and brave the city again. Thanks to the wonderful people at our hotel, we navigated the subway to the Eiffel Tower like pros! We came out of the subway, turned a corner, and there was the Eiffel Tower right in front of us. Misty and I were both so excited. One of the most famous landmarks in the world, something we both have always wanted to see, and here it was right in front of us. That was a great feeling As we walked closer, I was overwhelmed by the size of the Eiffel Tower. I knew it would be big, even bigger than I had imagined, but wow. Standing under it and looking up at it is dizzying. It's amazing to me that people have been able to create something like that. Actually, standing under it, I started to get very nervous about going to the summit. I tried not to think about it because we had a few hours before we would be going up.
We decided to walk toward the Arc de Triomphe and the Champs-Elysees, which is the main street in Paris and has all of the fancy shopping. That's not a short walk, but it is amazing walk. We really got lucky too, because it was about 50 degrees and sunny in December! Evan did a great job walking all over Paris. We must have walked at least ten miles in two days and he walked every step of it. However, he was starting to get hungry. When we got to the busiest, fanciest street in Paris, where did we decide to eat? McDonald's. When the four-year-old who has been an angel wants chicken nuggets, you get him chicken nuggets. Just so you know, the McDonald's on Champs-Elysees is the craziest McDonald's I've ever been in. I have never seen so many people trying to satisfy their McCrave at one time. There were ordering machines where you could order and pay and then go pick up your order at the counter. If that's not your cup of tea, or the machine won't take your American credit card, you can go stand in a normal line. Only it isn't normal. People came around and took our order and gave us a slip of paper, and by the time we got through the line to pay, the order was ready. I liked this kind of service! This McDonald's even has macaroons, but we didn't buy any, because we were on our way to the fanciest bakery, Laduree.
I was told by a friend at work that I had to go to Laduree because it has the best cookies in the world. She was right. I had never had a macaroon before, and now I will probably have dreams about them. They are the most delicate cookies, with a little bit of a crisp on the outside, but a soft center and held together with cream, or ganache, or salted caramel. Oh my goodness. Go to Paris. Get a macaroon at Laduree. Trust me. You will pay 15 Euros just for six tiny cookies, but it will be worth every delicately succulent bite I can promise you that. (Shantana, if you read this, I know you are laughing at how you got everyone to like to fancy cookies!)
It was so gorgeous up there. We purposely waited until night to go up, so we could see the city all lit up. The lights twinkle every hour, too. We were on the tower when that happened and it was beautiful. I loved seeing my little boy admiring the lights. He has quite the life, huh?
My favorite picture is Misty at the summit. It was so windy up there, but look how happy she is to be there! It was so great.
The next day was The Louvre! Even if you don't love art, go to The Louvre. We were so lucky because we didn't have to wait in line long to get in, and when we got in, we checked our coats, and headed toward the Mona Lisa.
Before seeing Miss Mona though, we saw so many paintings, particularly of Jesus. I was surprised by how moved Evan was by the Jesus paintings. I mean, he goes to Catholic kindergarten, but he is only four. We stopped in front of one painting of Jesus on the cross, and I wanted to just keep moving but Evan told me, "Mommy, I want to keep looking at Jesus. Look, the bad guys nailed him to the cross and he has a crown of thorns. How is he going to get off the cross?" It was emotional watching how enthralled he was by Jesus. He just wanted to keep staring. When we did finally move on, we came across a painting of Jesus obviously off the cross showing the wounds from the nails. Evan was so relieved as he said, "Oh good. Look, Jesus got off the cross." He was amazed, and I was amazed with him.
Across from the Mona Lisa, just beyond the huge crowd of people, is the largest painting in the museum: The Wedding Feast. Misty wanted to see it so badly and we found it by accident, thinking we had somehow missed it. Evan loved that, too, because it was the biggest and it had Jesus in it. I can't even paint a tiny stick figure, so this artwork is mind-blowing to me. I loved all of it.
We made our way through the crowd of people and finally got close to the Mona Lisa. Now, many people have told me how unimpressed they were by the painting, but I will tell you that I am not one of those people. No, it isn't the biggest painting, but it is beautiful. Besides that, the chance to see the most famous painting in the world in the most famous museum in the world, that is truly an experience! I (again!) was emotional by being able to do something so spectacular, something that I never thought I would get to do. So, to all the haters, I love you, Mona Lisa! I think you are breathtaking!
I kind of thought I would be unimpressed by everything else after seeing Mona Lisa, but I wasn't. There are so many great things! Claude Monet has always been one of my favorite painters, and The Louvre has a few of his paintings. If I wanted to, I could just walk up and touch one (if I wanted to be banned for life from the museum probably!).
There were so many more great things I could talk about, but honestly you should just go see it yourself. Plus, this blog post is already a bit wordy! I will, however, tell you about the Egyptian embalming stuff.
The Egyptian section is HUGE. You could seriously get lost in there and no one would ever find you. The coolest part was that Misty is basically an Egyptian embalming expert because she studied it in school. She was telling me all about it and it was really interesting. I could tell you what she told me, but you should get your own awesome friend to tell you about it! Seriously, she knows a lot and she was excited seeing all of it. Evan loved it too, because they actually have a real mummy on display. Creepy? Maybe. But certainly awesome. It was during this part that some dude, we call him cream sweater, decided he didn't like how loud Misty was talking. She had on headphones (they have these cool guided tours on them!) and she was explaining stuff, so she was talking a little loud, but she wasn't screaming. This guy comes up to us and says, "Ma'am, don't put your voice so loud." He was rude. If he had been listening, he would have learned something. If you're out there Cream Sweater, you were a jerk. Don't tell people what to do.
We saw a million more beautiful things before leaving the museum. Afterwards, we went to to the Pont des Arts, known as "the Love Locks bridge," where people put a lock on the bridge and throw the key in the river, symbolizing their love. Misty put on a couple of locks and I think it would be fun to go back and try to find them again. Good luck with that, right?
We then headed on to the Notre Dame Cathedral and we actually got to go in during a mass. That was very moving. Evan saw a woman kneel down in front of a statue of Jesus to pray and he wanted to do the same. It was so sweet. So we said a prayer in the Notre Dame Cathedral during mass and (surprise!) we were emotional about it. Another great experience.
That was our last full day in Paris and we loved it. There are a couple of funny stories that I left out. One is the public toilets. If you haven't been to France, you should know that they have these electronic port-a-potties on crack! They are all around the public places and after you come out, the door closes and supposedly cleans the floor and toilet. I say supposedly because it wasn't that clean. Anyway, we had to wait in a long line for this thing and it took forever every time someone came out to clean. It clearly said only one person at a time unless accompanying a child, but we decided we should go in together so we wouldn't have to wait as long. Then Misty said, "But are we going to get in trouble?" And I said, "By who? And what are they going to do, rocket us to the moon?" She started laughing so hard and I started saying, "Zum flughafen (which means "to the airport," and is for some reason my favorite German phrase). First stop, the moon!" It was actually very funny if you were there, and you're welcome for sharing our joke with you. If you say "zum flughafen" to Evan, he will reply, "First stop, the moon!"
The last thing is our lack of French speaking skills. Misty brought a bunch of French books, but my favorite was "Hide this French Phrase Book." It was good just for learning phrases without trying to learn the rules of the language. (Disclaimer: no one is paying me to say that. It's really just a good phrase book. And hilarious. Buy one just for the laughs!) So the title of this post means, "Hello, ma'am. I would like..." because "I would like" is basically all we learned how to say and we only learned to say that so we could eat. However, I did use the phrase book to call room service and order more towels and blankets for our room. Misty was so impressed by my broken French and that they understood me that she screamed in excitement and scared Evan! It was great.
I hope, if you read this far, that you want to visit Paris and that you laughed at our experience. I'm so glad we got to go together, Misty. And Evan, when you are old enough to read, know that you are seriously the best traveler in the world! Much better than the adults! Oh, and in case you were wondering, we just paid for a cab back to the airport. Forget those buses.
